The world is subjective
I don’t know your take on the world. Maybe you think it’s a chaotic mass of destruction. Maybe you are more of an optimistic being and the world is your haven – simply because there is no escape. Maybe you can’t be bothered to give two meagre shits about the world. Life is hard as it is.
Whatever your stance maybe, here is a fact: The world is subjective, which is to say your world is different from mine and it’s impossible to share your world with anyone else.
Yeah yeah, I’ve heard all that philosophical gibberish. What’s your point?
Let’s take an example. Well water stays at a constant temperature of 18 degrees throughout the year, but when you drink from it in the winter, the water would feel warm to you – a mild anecdote against the freezing cold. When you drink from it in the summer, the water would feel cool – a sip of heaven in the scorching heat.
So, you see the temperature of the well water according to the thermometer is an objective number. However, how it seems to you is a matter of subjectivity – depending on the season.
When you view the world as a place of chaos and contradictions where peace is but a mere illusion and happiness a fleeting emotion – you give in to the undeniable quality of subjectivity. You forget that your take on the world is a reflection of you and the situation of your life – which are, by nature, changeable.
So, the question is not whether the world is a shitty place or not – the question is are you willing to work on the shittiness of your life?
Because just like the nature of well water depends on the season, your take on the world depends on your life.
But I’m not Beyonce. My life is essentially fucked.
What makes you think Beyonce has a perfect life? Again, this is a matter of subjectivity.
Which brings me to my second point.
Are You Stuck In Psychological Time?
When you say your life is fucked, you’re basically stuck in psychological time. Unable to move forward because of a shitty past experience or an ideal future you fear will only exist in your fickle day dreams.
The present is lost to you. So your mind takes you from one possible problem to another, one insignificant past incidence to another until you’re trapped inside your own head, damning the bygones and fearing what might never come to pass.
In Alderian psychology, this is known as aetiology, a theory Alfred Adler strongly opposed. From an aetiological standpoint, your past defines your present. So, once a failure, always a failure.
The theory proposed by Adler, known as teleology, supports a much more practical standpoint. According to teleology, the past can have a powerful influence on the personality of a person. But contrary to common belief, no experience is a cause of a fucked up life. The only thing that determines your life and shapes your personality is the meaning you give to your experiences.
Wait, so you’re saying trauma is a gimmick?
Oh, no. Definitely not. Trauma exists, but whether your past experience turns your life upside down and sends you down a rabbit hole, never to be seen again, is definitely a self-determining matter.
Because your past does not define your present, and the future is merely an illusion, an excuse. It does not exist.
If you do not live in the moment, you don’t live at all. That is all there is to life. The Present Moment.
Now if you think your life is all fucked up, what is stopping you from unfucking it?
Fear of failure?
A bad record?
The fact that your teacher said you’d never be successful in middle grade?
Your parents’ expectations?
Can’t you see these are all concoctions of phycological time? They do not exist.
Fuck them all
They don’t care. Even though they are probably talking about you at a certain family gathering or social media post right now. People live for gossip. Why do you mind?
Here is the thing: They’ll embarrass you in front of one-fifty, well dressed elites, you’ll wanna bash their teeth in, but you won’t. They’ll make a joke to break the ice, laugh like a maniac and move on to spoil someone else’s mood.
Even if you’re not a perpetual people-pleaser, you probably still don’t want to look like a fool in front of the world so you talk about books you didn’t really understand, rave about movies you only partially enjoyed and study a subject you cannot wrap your head around.
When your life is determined by societal values, you live a lie, and a profound one at that. So intricate that you forget where the facade drops. You forget what you really enjoy. You resent the world for making you miserable, but the truth is you are the only reason you’re here, trapped under the mountain of lies you thought would make them happy.
But nothing does, does it?
So why don’t you fuck ‘em all?
The only way to free yourself is to embrace yourself and have the courage to be disliked. Are you brave enough for that?